Monday 19.11.2012

arsenal_fc-svgBefore I went to faculty I opened Facebook to see if there were any news from Al, there were: He had shared an Arsenal photo the previous day. Didn’t accept me. Let it be. I am able to check all about his profile via Sarah’s one. I can even chat with him. Now he just has less value to me. And I thought there was hope for him…

I wasn’t late on L.A. practices. Thomas asked a pen from me, but mine wasn’t “quality”. Muhammed arrived late with Christian.

After the practices, Muhammed invited me to go in a restaurant on tea, I accepted.

On the road I called him “bro” after he did. Finally news about his leaving: he’s finishing the first semester here. We went at a restaurant up from the faculty – perhaps it was Chardak. Thomas entered and after him Benjamin.
-Can we sit here?
Thomas asked and sat next to Muhammed, Benjamin said next to me.
-Is he your friend? – Thomas asked Muhammed about me.
-Brother.
Benjamin asked me to confirm, I showed sign with my head.

Thomas stood up and it was the ordering turn. Muhammed ordered rice and potatoes, Benjamin beef sth and I was indecisive with my restaurant inexperience.
-What do you want? – Benjamin asked me.
After the listing by the waiter, I said:
-It’s all the same to me. Chicken.

tumblr_m9j28gvcyP1qdei8m.jpgDave dragged himself as well and sat at the head. He ordered chicken too. It turned out those things to be broths and I thought it was about patties. Mine was given to Dave, but he returned me and asked me if it was good. When I tried it, it was like I didn’t know what I was putting in my mouth, but I got used to it and told Dave it was good.

During the course Benjamin was rambling to Thomas that he and his friends beat someone from senior year high school who previously showed them knife. They made him bleed and apparently went to hospital. What was that pride? And Thomas pretended to be interested. At least people who see the real me see me as I am, without attachments, without extractions. I looked at Benjamin, but of course, Thomas was more important to him. Muhammed wanted he to shut up, he went on. I didn’t eat bread (all the others did) 516iqicyeul-_ac_ul320_sr276320_having eaten croissants in the morning. Muhammed wanted more water and I called “Waiter”, but the man didn’t come. Muhammed and I went to pay our meals. It cost 120 denars for both of us: He treated me again even though I opposed. We couldn’t find the door, and the others at the table laughed at us. Although I could laugh at their naivety many times, I chose God.

On the road, Muhammed didn’t know to tell me if the place was “Chardak”.

He wanted we to go at UGD’s sweet shop, but it was too much for me. It would have been gluttony. Side note: Someone in my place would just use him for free food. Upstairs, lecture room 10 was busy, so in the faculty yard we stood at Mike and a girl. Her name was Alison and Mike introduced Muhammed as Goce Delchev, and Muhammed Mike – Goce Delchev 2. Andrea came from the hall and joined us. She returned, and a company gathered around Mike and Alison (read the returned from the restaurant). I was standing aside, but Muhammed who got very close to Thomas, wasn’t forgetting me. The three of us sat in the hall where Muhammed called Thomas “a problem” because he talked a lot. Muhammed (who was looking at girls) saw a Turkish female friend of his, I asked him what she was to him. Thomas asked me whether I thought she was his girlfriend (definitely not, I just didn’t want to get lost in the talk) and asked me if I want Muhammed to “set” her up to me. Finally I said something related to religion saying that I cannot love a Turk.
-Who filled your head with nonsense?
-I’ve heard so – I said.

On the way to lecture room 10, Derek Veach was looking at me. I told him “Hi”.

Upstairs, I sat next to Muhammed. The it girl asked if the 3 people she saw in Zendolino with Muhammed were his roommates. Gulben translate finished the job.

I asked Gulben if she worked somewhere as she’d written in the Facebook group she couldn’t come to the students’ party due to work. She told me she worked at Dr. Organdziski as a cleaner.

This Monday Thomas was throwing little chalks towards me. I liked it. At least somebody was interacting with me. Andrea said he was crazy and told me to stop placing myself, I said I didn’t have what to do. He managed to hit me above my mouth. Most of his tries were imprecise, but it was my readiness that mattered. He called me terminator-genisys-review“Terminator” and commented that I’m very strong. Well, I’m not as strong as I’m brave, but this is fine too. You know Who gives me the courage. I even dared to hold my mouth gaped when Thomas was “programming” me, but he missed. I didn’t blink until Muhammed put me his phone on my year to listen a Turkish song.

The Kumanovo guy was discussing dirty stuff with the reserved Nelson II and Andrea who directed him to ask me. He asked me if I want to record his and Andrea’s “movie” even though “you won’t get it up, but let it be”. I looked aside and smiled as a confirmation to the said (how did he know?) because no one dared to say to me that in face and I accepted asking him to give me a camera. He called me to shoot it, to which I said they should make a rehearsal first, then the professor entered.

After Linear Muhammed stayed to ask why he was gone in the list, I was walking alone, but eventually Mike, Thomas and Alison joined me. Thomas asked me who’s stronger between me and him, I said I, but surrendered when he suggested to do arm wrestling with him. arm-wrestling-clipart-cvfkcm-clipartThomas asked me if I wanted to go in heaven or hell and told me I should run 3 steps for heaven. Andrea who reached me hesitated whether to go on B.P. practices with our group, then returned back. Mike and Thomas discussed football, I walked in line with Alison. I didn’t go on B.P. with them saying I had appointed.

At F.E.S. Munin and I greeted each other. The assistant asked me how many points did I have B.P..

On the way out I passed besides Sarah who turned on the other side instead of looking at me. So she’s avoiding me… It’s known how things go with me: One sign and you are done. If you don’t want me, you won’t have me.

Outside, after I raced out Monique (“What are you doing?”), I hurried to arrive on my first potential blind date. I was where I met Milo at almost 15:20, they were gone. Was I late? Nevertheless I kept walking. An old man coming from the opposite side of the street was looking at me. Milo with beard? He was protesting against the sound from the car – like crying. It wasn’t my acquaintance. I turned another circle – they were gone. What happened:
A. I was too late?
B. They forgot
C. The girl was absent to school
D. She isn’t interested in me after my unpreparedness for sex
E. She had already found sexier (Perhaps Milo!)
F. Milo was the satan
???

In Preevytip I had arranged with mum to dentist. After the tooth repair mum and I saw my ex-French professor Joe, Andy shook hands with him.

About the day, while Muhammed was with others – Thomas or Mike, I consoled myself: No matter how much he talks to the others, for him I’ll always be “very good”. Like Adele’s post about the money: No matter how much it bends, gets dirty, starts ripping, it has a value. Jesus Christ is God on Earth and on the sky and on the cross.

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About Real real me

Writing a diary. Life is a FIGHT!
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