Monday 22.10.2012

Ducky told A.B. sth about me, Ted looked at me, then he turned his head and I just passed not looking at them. It could have been perfect, but it was easier for me not to dare.

In Stip I filled my time walking, sitting in the park and taking the Electrotechnics tasks.

I was just about to enter in the university when someone sitting in the distance exclaimed:
-Colleague!
I turned towards him. He was inviting me with his arm. It was Marcus and I went there. There were several colleagues of mine surrounding the table. Marcus suggested me to take a chair and join them.

After I sat, the it girl sitting next to him asked me:
-Didn’t you recognise us?
-I didn’t see you. I don’t wear my glasses.
She told Marcus I sat next to her twice on Electrotechnics practices .
-You remember. – I was free to our it girl.
-I remember. How wouldn’t I remember?
Because some “it” girls are very “upped”.

I asked her:
-Were you Sarah?
-Sarah.
-Are you from here?
-I’m from here.
-What have you finished?
-Gymnasium.
-Uh-um. (I nodded).
She later asked me about the school too.
Speaking about the upcoming students’ party on Wednesday, she asked me if I would go.
-No.
-Why?
-Where is it?
The name may have been “Angels” which she explained it was behind the F.E.S.. The it girl teased me:
-There are girls as much as you want.
Well you are one of them. I was just smiling knowing it contradicts with the religion. The party started at midnight, I admitted I had nowhere to go. Someone suggested straight to lectures, Marcus suggested the free place at him but “No, most sincerely, he has nowhere to go” followed by Sarah.

Our it girl was interested in some Serbian song that a colleague wrote the chorus of and Gülben played it on Youtube on her smartphone.

The it girl claimed that she was the only one that hangs me out, but I said “Him too” looking at Marcus who told me to speak louder.

The others were quiet, I wasn’t saying anything at all, so Marcus’s usual “say something, bro” was inevitable.
-I don’t know them. – I replied.
The it girl told introduced me with the rest of the table “sitters”. Others came too, but they were standing. The one next to me asked me:
-Are you that Nick that is first signed?
-Yes.
Another one standing asked me how many points I entered with. He said he had 99, but he was added later. I recognised him – he was the one sitting next to me last Wednesday. He said I looked like him (there it is the my look), to which I just smiled, not that I didn’t have what to say.

Then I guess, Marcus asked me again to say something, I have told him I don’t know them meaning by personality, not their names and I stopped the it girl repeating the names saying I to tell them.
-Dean, Albert… Daisy, Gülben, Tailor…
They were surprised by my memory, but after I told only “Zachary” from four or three guys, I heard I needed an upgrade as I only had 2GB memory. That’s enough for me, if he meant RAM. The truth is I wasn’t even trying to remember those that I didn’t say. Gotcha!

Sarah told me the names of four more guys, but even at the end I became aware she was doing it. The thin standing the-one-who-claimed-have-99-points invited me to go inside with him addressing me with “Nicky”. I accepted. He showed me appreciation, here’s the respect:
-What’s your name?
-Mike.
?
We sat together briefly in the hall and in lecture number 10, he invited me to sit in the last row next to him, but I couldn’t see from there, so I occupied the row number 4.

After one of the mines 2 helloed a friend of him, I told him Hello too, without feedback. Muhammed sat next to me. The it girl and Al were telling jokes – but hers were dominated by gays, and his – with grandmas. Sarah pleaded she never had a gay friend or at least she hasn’t recognised one. Muhammed laughed, I asked him if he knew what was “queer”, he 024565706_prevstillshowed a gesture with his hand telling me the Turkish name for it. The it girl commented if someone speaks low to her, she does it that way too pointing me as an example. I like her more than our ex-it. She’s very open and sincere, something that is very positive in communication. After playing with my pen, Muhammed went out to buy cigarettes. He answered to me he was from Istanbul, but just repeated me about the reason for his coming here. “To change a little” – I said, he agreed. He asked me where I was from and added that it’s calmer living in village. Then he went in the hall after his cell phone rang. Mike asked me if I smoked as I passed Muhammed cigarettes.

Someone informed us we won’t have Linear Algebra, so we left. Mike asked me was I going, I replied that I would walk across the town. He and the potential #4 (from our popular guys) were going on the coffee.

In the yard Andrea told me she considered calling me as she didn’t see me. She wanted I to walk with her and the two Nelsons but I said I’m not from the first group whose next practices started at 12:30, and ours from 2. Although I was walking alone, I realised with my real abilities I could became our “it” boy even without the look. I was happy.

After my standard tour, earlier I went at F.E.S.. After Nelson II went out I asked him “Will you leave?” Munin went out confessing he “escaped”. David and #3 sat on another bench and the handsome now-deeply shaven guy attracting girl sat next to me.

In the lecture room, I decided to sit on Muhammed’s place in the third row. On my question, he told me the computer worked, but he didn’t log in as he didn’t have a[n index] number. Side note: He touched my back. The most handsome guy was looking at me, but stopped when I directioned my head towards him. Wondering, ah? The feeling when others think that you are insane and experience this kind of moment… I tremendously want to know what is it like.

Next to me sat the mines 2. A problem: There was something wrong with Dev C++, but I’m a persistent person. I went to its website and downloaded it, but… I needed the administrator’s user name and password. One of the mines 2 asked me if it didn’t work and said “You fucked it up”. Me? However, my ambitiousness led me to sit in the same row from the other side of the threesome. I asked him exercise number what we are and he asked his friend to tell me. The guy next to me was faster than me in creating programs and surprisingly he was the one who found my mistake when I couldn’t compile my work. I had written |, there should have been ). Clever him. He decided not to make our third assigned program.
-Are you bored?
-Аh?
I looked at him.
-Are you bored?
-Yeah.
My secret for the relationship without fear? I felt them like family. Besides when I already call them Mines 2, I am 100% sure they’re good souls. And there are results and more to come. Soon.

Outside nobody took the path I did.

My phone was ringing inside, there it was again – with “Andrea” on it. What? Wasn’t it mum?

I’ll be short: She had assumed I was home, she didn’t attend B.P., someone else signed for her, my cousin Steven told Nelson I to defend me if someone bullied me and she wanted I to come at her place to practice B.P. with possibility to call some Mack to show us, but she didn’t get what she wanted after I told her I was going to Preevytip. “If you want tomorrow beep me, I’ll call you”, she said at the end.

Just when everything was going well… However, I didn’t get upset as when Barbara or Elaine would arrange a visit. Whatever it is, it will pass. Should I stick to the rule “Keep your enemies closer”? I could choose, there was an “if”.

In Preevytip, I finally went at the dentist with mum. The doctor recommended to see if I can wear my old braces first, so he just sealed me a teeth.

Then… a new haircut at Charlie’s.

Sarah (my cousin) had come in Zlox with the high-schoolers bus in which two males sitting behind her were saying “Sarry, Sarry”, as they were saying “Nicky” to me. She assumed those were Superman and Martin.

A holiday was ahead of me and I had Andrea in mind…

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About Real real me

Writing a diary. Life is a FIGHT!
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