03.08.2012 – 05.08.2012

Friday 03.08.2012

8:30, guests from Kumanovo coming. I disliked it, as Christine could have done her turn earlier this summer but… what to do, I put a fake smile while she was giving me the gift and George saw it, after which he also smiled when he helloed me. I concluded he wasn’t even on level 1 of the art of learning the fake smiling. My original plan was to be in a separate room from the guests, but females of my family dissuaded me. Grandma advised me that if I don’t come they’ll think I’m not good. (And what else do I want to achieve with the fake me?) George left in order to meet his friends, I used the opportunity to spend some time in my room – on the window.

Ducky’s brother and Alex passed and saw me through the open window. Lester asked me:
-Wher’ are you?
I moved my head outside, I said:
-I’m here.
-… – he said not looking at me so I couldn’t understand him clearly.
-You don’t have brain. – His friend said to him.
Why? For seeing a potential in me?

I later realised his missed sentence was another question to me: “How are you”.
Definitely he and Ducky are brothers.

Mum doubted I’d go to holiday to Greece as she was not sure how would I manage myself.

 

Saturday 04.08.2012

In the evening, I realised I was ready to give Sarah a second chance, but only with the real me because I remember her for good as well.

 

Sunday 05.08.2012

The fantasy for studying for those 20 final days vividly wasn’t a dream – in another dream of mine. I found myself in the classroom where the geologists learnt and I wanted to sit in the last desk to get closer to Marcus who sat two desks in front of me, but Marcus and Mario (the guy in the penultimate desk) were keeping the place to Rob T..

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About Real real me

Writing a diary. Life is a FIGHT!
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