Friday 15 06 2012
No Internet today, so – writing in the diary and checking CD’s.
Saturday 16 06 2012
In the late afternoon, I took a walk with my parents to a field of ours from “the opposite”. When we started, Derr was waiting for sb near my house. I was uncomfortable – seeing him was making me to smile, but I tried to look like I don’t know him (in front of my parents).
-Get upwards, why are you cowered like that? Who from? – Mum asked.
I didn’t answer her, I guess she didn’t need it, as she probably saw him. I assumed he’s waiting for Brian. He didn’t say anything to me, but my eyes peeking towards him gave me knowledge he’s looking at me. Since I saw him, it was the turn to see Brian too, but a car with males inside crashed my assumption.
We discussed faculty. Dad told me to analyze the students the first month. But if I do it, the others will make friends, I’ll stay alone again. I consider myself to have a good ability when it comes to evaluating people. Taking the fact it’s gonna be the real me… Mum warned me to be careful about lending money, I didn’t want to lie that I don’t have.
-Why later to hate you?
What? As a Christian I’m not afraid from people (from God exclusively) and better some human to hate me, than God. Unfortunately, she is not aware of it.
On the way back, I noticed someone that could be one of those guys, dad lagged behind us, and I didn’t want him to know I’m closer to mum.
It was Al.
I turned around – Dad was lightening a cigarette, it would have been too childish to wait for or with him – I carried on. Al looked at me, but when he saw I looked at him too despite being with the eyes only, he withdrew. No hello? I wasn’t disappointed like the last time when some of “the mines” didn’t say anything to me. I have experience now. I will keep loving them forever, but a good soul isn’t unique as God is. (Meaning I’ll find good souls on faculty.)
Home, I created some rules about my behavior in Stip:
1. Be the real you and ONLY the real You.
2. Break some Christian rule (they broke bunch of them).
3. When the others talk of you, it’s a plus.