Monday 19.03.2012

While waiting the others to climb in the bus Ducky looked at me then said:
-Eh, dick that I’ll keep you place now.
Was it addressed to me? But a friend of his was next to him. And he said sth to Ducky after it.
I entered and while walking and waiting for somebody to find me place I suddenly saw that a full seat ahead of me was free. I sat and a female student from first year asked me:
-May I?
-Yes. – I replied her.
I was thinking about Ducky’s comment. At a moment I was sure it was to his friend, but now I’m sure he said to me considering the Friday morning. If you do something once, doesn’t mean you will do it perpetually. However I loved that he used same words that he would use in front of his friends.
In school I made a sin again, I gossiped. I gossiped to Barbara my family’s comments about the reception. The most terrible was grandma’s:
-The poor people serve more;
after  what she asked:
-Does she consider us for poor?
-I don’t know – I said.
I knew it was a sin and I told her “It’s gossiping” with a smile feeling embarrassed. She said:
-Let it, what’s the matter with that?
3063357447_e6b19f94f7 - CopyShe obviously didn’t consider gossiping that way. I continued because I knew how I would have felt if somebody hid sth from me. I told her about Stevche’s help, the beautiful salads decoration, the full bags from the market, Nancy’s 5kg kifli as a gift…
Those are sins. I will try not to make ones anymore.
I’m sorry. Obviously I put myself in front of God. He should be my number 1.
I had A on the English written work.
While waiting for mum and for the bus, some of that gang’s members arrived: First was Ted who came from my right and sat on little wall in front of the Stokovna from my left side. He was followed by Ducky to who Ted said:
-There? – Referring to the position he planned to sit – to my right.
-Next to Nicky. – said Ducky with his modified voice.
Not to omit that another gang: Marcus, Daniel and Neil, were in front of me. I was surrounded with guys from three sides and with a little wall from the fourth. I didn’t know where to look, so my eyes were turned between my front and my left, but I did not move myself away. A guy from those three standing said to me:
-Wait, go there, I to sit.
No name mentioning, in fact I couldn’t remember his name at the moment. Home I knew it was Daniel.
Now, it was my turn to be a friend or not to be.
Unfortunately I couldn’t even consider it, because of my mum. She was supposed to come any moment. What if she sees me with guys? I will tell her they came next to me.
Then the bus came. Stupid me. I forgot I have God to protect me. I regret about it now. I saw mum even in the bus and we sat together (oops, I was gonna miss it) but… behind us was sitting Rob (they are all in game you know) and when mum asked me to tell more about my interrogation Macedonian I said:
-I will tell you home. – after what she turned her head to see who was sitting behind us. So what? I have right to do it. If he wants to know something about me he can ask me.
When the dark fell, some people passed on the road, after who I went on the window to see them.
-Buy yourself a life, kid. – said a female voice from “the opposite”.
I kept looking and a male voice said:
-Let me show you.
I assume he meant in the sexual sense. Who could he have been?

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About Real real me

Writing a diary. Life is a FIGHT!
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