Tuesday 06.03.2012

When you at least expect…
Who you at least expect from…

Seemed like there was no free seat in the bus for me. Brian (totally unexpected) said to A.B.
-_______ (name, perhaps Hundred or Al) let the “little kid” sit next to you.
Little kid. Somebody called me like that after my 18th year. I assume God acted through him.
A.B. said:
-Come Nicky – taking back his bag.
I sat. A.B. commented:
-You will recover as well.
Possibly linking the last evening’s event. I will. I promise. If it needs only for you. J
And the unwanted thing: How come Elaine stands when I sit next to one of them? She said to me:
-Oo you were here.
I just nodded. Towards the end she said:
-Did you study Economy? We have interrogation Economy, I know.
-I studied – I said.
Then I put my bag on me and stood up. I realized I did it too early. I’m sorry, I have a bad vision.
A.B.: What’s with him?
Marcus the Pig answered something.
See? There’s no judging. God will consider this.
While walking towards school Brian went in ahead of me so I was equally distanced from him and Derek (from Zlox). He said:
-Dar.
Derek looked him and said something to him (probably his name, but what accent or which version?) They had something more than me and it was Ethan as a mutual friend. It wasn’t fair. I entered before Brian.
It was Tuesday which meant after school I had to go on those additional trainings for senior students. I stayed in the classroom with Elaine. She was speaking to me about that money she had returned to me last Wednesday. E. and Derek came and they spoke about Cassandra:
Derek: She uses drugs?
Elaine: I don’t know. Didn’t you hear in front of the school when she said her mother found her condoms and “pot”?
Ethan: Condoms. That’s good.
weed-legalized-porn-condoms - CopyHow can using condoms be a good thing? We are Christians. Condoms ARE forbidden. Or he is from those who only believe in God when they have needs.
They spoke about the prom and Derek said he would ask his partner to give him (sex), if not he would leave her. Elaine who currently was without one, asked me:
-Do you want me to be your girlfriend?
-Say “Yes” – Derek said to me.
You want things to be on your way at those moments when you when you talk to me a bit? They won’t.
-You have a boyfriend. – I said.
Elaine said I was good-looking, to which Derek smiled and she said: “Don’t laugh”.
-I mean he isn’t good-looking as those from the movies (referring TV series)… You should go out not to be cowered.
When Derek asked me what would I buy to Ashley (my prom partner), I said “I don’t know”, after what E. said something silently that I think it referred to me, but he was overspoken by Elaine. After they went out, Elaine advised me to go to buy food in the mornings.
Mum wasn’t on the waiting area so I went to the old school, on the way I met Tiffany and Sarah. We saw Melanie Collins and Barbara Griffin sitting on the stairs in front of the old school and went there. Sarah said something to me (probably about the exhaustion) after what I said:
– If it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t go on the trainings.
–Why? She asked.
–Why you to know more than me?
She told it to Tiffany. What? Hurt? Tiffany said: “I don’t believe that”. Melanie Collins said “I don’t believe it either. You want to make yourself interesting.”
No comment from my side.
It was good better they didn’t believe me. They didn’t know the real me. (Looks like I’m achieving my target: Not showing the real me for them not to be able to reach me when I get popular.) It was true whether they believed it or not. I want to be interesting? At least I don’t say: “(name) _____, my best friend”, to the first person I see. You think I don’t want go home earlier like the majority from Zlox? I don’t want to have events in the bus? …I mean it’s worthless trying to explain to sb who wouldn’t believe me.
It was better on English now. If last time it was bad, let’s say now it was neutral. Marcus gave us a task to watch 10 movies and to take out 10 words from each as a homework for the next Tuesday. David was late and he said next to me. He saw from me we should write an informal letter. I gave the professor my pen (“Or I’m looking for eyes from a blind person?”). David didn’t know how to pronounce “dude”, so he looked on my side. No, I didn’t tell him. And I knew it, just… he hadn’t said anything to me before that. I think he and the professor established a friendly relationship, as the professor was looking his organization in the notebook. Marcus did not return me the pen.
On Macedonian positive energy was transferred on us again. The professor mentioned my cousin Steven when speaking of the way the professors approach students. In the end when I stood on her way she to take her jacket she said:
-You have one boy, but he is very calm.
I moved right she to pass.
The taxi driver called me “buddy” twice.

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About Real real me

Writing a diary. Life is a FIGHT!
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