Thursday 02.02.2012

<Exactly one year after I came out as gay to my class.>

It didn’t go the way I expected to.

For a wonder, since there weren’t available seats in the bus, Zander offered me to sit next to him.

-Nick will you sit?

-I don’t need to.

-C’mon sit.

And his friend Wayne stood up. Was it the gender or the blood?

On Business, Denise sat next to me and said “Happy holiday” to Darryl. Not to me.

I don’t remember whether it was on a lesson or a break, E. said that boys were allowed to do what they wanted because it was their holiday. I wonder why the boys from my class say it’s their holiday when it isn’t. They are not gay and Darryl once said he hates gays. It’s abuse. It’s disrespect to those who suffer every day because they are born with different sexuality like me.

You have all the year, let us rule for a day.

Recently on the TV show “Something + with Kate”, the hostess said “God forbid” on Aleksandar Tarabunov’s statement “We all love girls. Some love boys.” I first received negatively, but then… she was right. It is true, because of the (non-)treatment of the homosexuals in our society. There is one God for all of us.

On Sport, I, Ethan and Derek Veach were the only ones in sportswear. The professor said that I should hold a lecture in front of the board. Sarah moaned that “It was not right” whatever sense she meant because the minority didn’t do that. The professor said that that’s why Macedonia couldn’t succeed. After it, he looked at me. What? It was not that sensitive Nick anymore. I didn’t care as long as it contributes to reach A. Let her moan, she is the damaged one. Minutes later Kathy punched Ethan and Darryl in the balls. It specifically hurt E.. Kathy apologized. I considered the situation as a punishment from God for not respecting the 02.02.. The same day, the two males who attributed the unofficial holiday to them. See that God exists?

There were two baskets occupied by Derek V. and Ethan. Derek went out and I took his basket. E. first moved closer to the basket, then went at the class and the professor Joshua. After a while Derek came back and I passed the ball to him and he said “Throw” and then basket-itemno-9he after me to play on taking out. I accepted. During the game E. asked him “Are you losing?” He wasn’t. He was good since the beginning, I was leading only at one moment and he won me with 11-8. The result didn’t matter to me, our friendship was important. Then he called me to change over. In the hall I was leaving, but I wasn’t the only one, two by two were climbing upstairs, a class in which some of the students travel with me. And at least 2 of them said “Nucky”. I obviously meant something to them. So I turned around twice, but I didn’t say a thing. I recognized Dave. Thank you. Outside I almost reached Derek and he said “C’mon Nick”. We didn’t even walk 10m when he stopped. I walked.

Sarah took my turn and got in the bus before me and I gave advantage to Mary. Inside she said “We will descend this one” – the moving seat. I pulled it back. When the back door opened in Ratabitz she said “Noo” and put her hand to my shoulder. She said “Tell him to close it.” Wow! She was feeling me like a man – someone to protect her. All I had to do was take a breath and shout “Close the back door”, but I obviously put myself on the first place. If I had shouted it would have been a surprise for everybody in the bus except for the bus driver. Later Mary said “Move yourself” and I gave her chance to sit next to the window. It didn’t occur to me that I would come out first.

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About Real real me

Writing a diary. Life is a FIGHT!
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